Thursday, December 1, 2022

“We can’t please everyone anyway”

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“We can’t please everyone anyway”

Many people are constantly concerned about what other people think of them. A psychologist explains where this behavior pattern comes from and what you can do about it.


The fear of not pleasing others runs deep within us.

Constantly trying to please everyone is not good for our mental health. Nevertheless, many cannot let go of this insatiable desire for recognition. «The fear of not pleasing others is deeply rooted in us and has to do with the fact that we are social beings. We used to be in smaller communities and it was important to get along with everyone and to get along well with everyone, because exclusion would have been life-threatening in the worst case,” explains psychologist Ben Kneubühler (35).

From a psychological point of view, there are, among other things, the basic needs for attachment and self-esteem. When you feel included, have a sense of achievement, and look good in front of others, those needs are met. “Another reason for the fear of not pleasing others can be past experiences, for example with parents or other close caregivers,” adds Kneubühler.

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